They say we don’t choose our family; we get what we’re given and all that. I mean, I love my grandkids- all TWELVE of them- but I definitely don’t when it comes to the Holidays.
Family is a funny thing. They’re the ones who are able to annoy us the most, but also the ones who love us the most. They’re the ones who give us the greatest laughs but also the most tears (especially when my youngest came home with a sleeve tattoo- I very nearly spat my dentures out!).
But, focussing on the laughs, here’s 12 family life scenarios that really tickled me. If I know you all as well as I think I do, then I’m sure you’ll enjoy these as much…
“Which one do you prefer, babe?”
Ladies, we’ve probably all been there (I know I have- you guys know I’m a big fan of a manicure). Anyone who isn’t won’t understand that committing to a colour is always the hardest decision of the month.
To us ladies, we can see the difference here, but for our other halves, I can see where the confusion lies. I know my eyes aren’t what they used to be, but I can still tell a crimson from a scarlet.
“Year No. 4 at my wife’s family reunion.”
Ahh, I remember the days I used to get invited to my school reunions- they were the days. Most of us have popped our clogs now though…
It was always fun and games seeing which of my predictions on first to get married, pregnant, etc were. I was often right y’all, I always knew I had a sixth sense.
“Marriage is all about compromise. For example, I didn’t really want a dog. My wife did. So we compromised… And here is our new puppy Copper.”
We all know that what a lady wants, a lady gets.
“I needed to borrow my wife’s phone… she said her password was our anniversary. I gave the phone back and said I didn’t know what happened.”
Typical man. This one really tickled me just imagining his wife’s reaction. Utter disgrace.
“While my wife was at work today, I had some fun by adding a couple of things to our daughter’s Magic SleepSuit.”
Look how adorable this little man is in his makeshift spacesuit. Surely his Mummy can’t have been mad with Daddy?
“A guy I know from work took his sons to Hooters for the first time and captured this.”
Boys will be boys, ey?
It seems it doesn’t matter their age, they’ll all react the same way.
“This was a birthday gift from my wife, because I eat cereal way too much, at all times of the day and night.”
“I tossed a fortune cookie in my wife’s lunch today and she angrily sent me this picture. Like I control the fortunes inside the cookies and I picked this one on purpose.”
If there’s anything us ladies can get a bit het up about and that’s our weight (also being called a cow never goes down well).
Imagine this man’s face when his wife sent him this picture- out of all in the fortune cookies in the world and he happened to have thrown this one to her.
I know us ladies can be a bit irrational from time to time, but even I can sympathise with her husband on this one- who was he to know, unless he actually wrote the thing…
“I didn’t realize my wife left the kids’ presents in the car until I checked the rear view mirror.”
You know when you just get the feeling that someone’s watching you?
“My wife is 5’1” and I am 6’7″ — when it comes to hotel robes, one size does not fit all.”
Is anyone else thinking what I am? How has this man got nicer legs than I’ll ever have.
You know what they say- if you’ve got it, flaunt it…
“My wife asked me to hard boil some, but not all, of the eggs.”
He’s given this joke a good crack, hasn’t he. I can’t imagine his wife was overly impressed with his practical joke though. I know I would have wanted to crack one over my husband’s bold head, given the chance.
“On the night shift, wife sends this”
They say ‘when the cats away, the dogs will play’- well, I know that’s not exactly how the saying goes, but I know ya’ll get my gist.
Help your AA out and make me feel better about my dysfunctional family by letting me know down in the comments which you can relate to! I hope all 12 like me…